What really mattered at UFC 234 in Melbourne, Australia, on Saturday night? Here are a few things …

1. Oh no, not “Bobby Knuckles” …

One minute you’re Robert Whittaker, the UFC middleweight champ, getting ready to defend your title in front of your countrymen in a sold-out main-event bout. Next thing you know, you’re getting rushed into surgery with people throwing around terms like “collapsed bowel,” which, go ahead and raise your hand if you could have happily lived the rest of your life without knowing that was an actual possibility.

So now what happens? Kelvin Gastelum initially responded with a classy social media post, then showed up hours later with a phony belt, talking about how he’d gladly give Whittaker a shot at his title. It’s a textbook move for a pro wrestling heel – or maybe just a desperate ploy by a contender who’s worried that he’ll lose his spot in line.

Now we’ve got a real mess on our hands. And nothing about the phrase “emergency surgery” makes me think it’s going to get sorted out terribly quickly.

1 2 3 4 …5